January, 2010 Archives


What I Think

by Pj in Family, Random

This little being was born 52 years ago at 7:45 a.m. Today as she made a wish on 52 candles she thought, what would it be like if just once a year at the exact moment one was born one could make a wish and it really would come true. Hmmmm, interesting premise to think about.

This week-end I watched THE INSIDER with Al Pacino. It was based on a true story about the tobacco industry and how 60 Minutes’ reputation was tarnished over how they chose to NOT disclose all that they knew to protect jobs, theirs and by extension the tobaccos. Mike Wallace was asked why he allowed this to occur. In the movie, he said something like, ‘it doesn’t matter about all the good things you might have done in your life, what people remember is the last thing you did.’ I might add people seem to always remember the worst things as well.

So at 52 I am contemplating that thought. Someone once asked why I gave a rip about what others thought. And yet I do and if you are honest at all you will recognize that you do as well. I look at this little girl who I once was. I have been told I was a very happy baby. Well, you can tell I was well fed! What I believe is she didn’t give a rip….yet. AND, she was happy! Double AND, her being authentic quite naturally made others happy too! I think I miss her. Now, some who know me might say I don’t act like I care too much about what people think. What my wish this year is to care what SHE thinks. At the end of my life that is what will matter most to me anyway.

In the mean time, Thanks to all who were kind enough to extend birthday wishes today. I appreciate being remembered. Always nice to hear and read what you are thinking.

( I crack myself up!)


Rejection Rejected, Reject

by Pj in Family

Somebody Unimportant
Everywhere, Iapplied
Arizona, USA

Dear Body,

Thank you for your letter(s) over the last few months. After careful consideration, I heretofor inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me the position I applied to in your company.

This year I have received an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite your obvious qualities and skills in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection letter does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore, I will be arriving to work Monday morning promptly at 8:00 a.m. Please have someone there with my key and employee paper work ready to fill out. I would like to get that taken care of before 10:00 a.m. I look forward to seeing you then.

Continued luck in rejecting other applicants.


Pamela Bowman



by Pj in Family

“If you’re going on even an entry-level job interview take the time to follow up with a handwritten note, even if your handwriting isn’t the best and even if you can’t use four-syllable words. Just showing that initiative makes a difference. If someone takes the time to write a note … I’ve had many employers tell me it’s a way they make a decision about hiring.” Cindy Zimmerman

Does this count?



by Pj in Film Production, Random, Screenwriting

As I ride in the morning I often see this visually interesting shot. I want a crane to get the movement without the camera shadow. I think, movie? music video? documentary? hmmm. By the time I get to the park I pretty much have forgotten about the shot. After all by then I have moved on to movie ideas, the thought of falling into the canal, the scene re-write for the day, the man wearing a purple jogging suit (rather unattractive, shouldn’t someone tell him?) and all the little chores I am suppose to take care of that day. Day after day, except cloudy ones, I see the image again and I remember again and I begin again. That could be a great shot. The subtext. The rough gray wall, the shadow and movement. I arrive at the cement picnic table breathless because a.) I’m tired and b.) I see this. Blinded with the possibilities of this life, my life. Back on the bike. So much I want to learn and do and see. Chasing that shadow that is always a tad ahead of me. Keep pumping. Keep pumping. Keep pumping.


Slap Me

by Pj in Family

I woke up weepy. Sometimes life seems so overwhelming that all the wonderful moments are invisible.

I checked my computer and found this. There you go slapping me along the side of the head, “snap out of it!”

Feel the love?



by Pj in Family

“Your imagination is your preview of life’s coming attractions.” Albert Einstein

It has been over 10 years since we moved from Mexico. It was August of 1999. And when we arrived we could not help but feel the frenzy. People were buying duct tape and food storage and generators in preparation of the new millennium. Remember that? That was a decade ago! Something wonderful happened on January 1, 2000… A new day, a new year, a new decade and a new millennium. Amazing.

During the last 10 years many people have encountered a need for that duct tape, that food storage and even those generators. Perhaps our imagination did not specify time and space and distance.

Your mind is a powerful magnet that will attract to you the things you identify yourself with. If you have sad thoughts, you will attract tragedies. If you are a good man, you will attract the company of good people. Alfredo Karras.

This week we start again with a new year, a new decade. And I believe what you imagine will happen, it is just a matter of time. For me what I imagine and feel under the layers of “our current” situation is hope. And I sense that same hope in many I meet and know. What I believe is the positive thoughts have just as much power as the negative. I want to give them more and I believe to do that I need to actually think more positively, write more positively and live more abundantly.

See them always as open, and thus the doors shall be. Johni Redd

In 10 years where will your imagination have taken you? I don’t know where mine is taking me. I am imagining all sorts of things. What I believe to be true is what I imagine has a funny way of showing up in unexpected and unimagined ways. So, imagine with me. Positive thoughts. Positive action. Positively wonderful! It’s going to be a great decade starting…. Right…… NOW!

Thoughts held in mind, produce after their kind. Unknown


Playing Parents

by Pj in Family

“If you raise your children to feel that they can accomplish any goal or task they decide upon, you will have succeeded as a parent and you will have given your children the greatest of all blessings” Brian Tracy

The end of this year I acknowledge the blessing my children have given me. My three oldest children have grown up to be productive members of society. They are independent, competent, kind, and living their own lives without needing me. My youngest is pretty much doing the same. Not sure how that happened, but I am pretty sure it was unavoidable. Kids do that. Grow up. I acknowledge that I fed them, clothed them, but who they have chosen to be was and is their choice.

Several people have asked me how we feel to have children who are so independent. They make it sound like it’s a bad thing. Like our kids are suppose to “need” us. I thought the point was to raise children to be self sufficient and independent, not an extension of me, but their own special wonderful person. I still think that.

Now what is true is that, as a parent, I find this painfully wonderful. Those feelings that began 26 years ago, when Isaac took his first breath, feelings like overwhelmed, unprepared, heavy, responsible, irresponsible, tender, angry, scared, joyous, certainly uncertain, humble, proud, grateful and, oh yea, love are still there lurking under the surface poking their head out at the most inopportune moments. But I survived and dang it, so did they!

And although I am sure that they may still come around to have a chat or share thoughts or feelings, (at least I hope they do) they won’t be expecting me or even wanting me to make the decisions of their lives. They won’t be telling their friends the standard excuse that their mother said no or yes. They are now wise and strong enough to tell themselves and others no or yes because that is what they want.

As a 12 year old girl, I remember wanting black and white ceramic hooks for my black and white bedroom that my parents decided I could decorate and paint by myself. I asked my father, in his daily adventures, to see if he could locate me some. He did and he brought them home and then he handed me the bill for them. I was shocked and honestly a little hurt, but in hindsight my father gave me a greater gift that day, ownership. It built my character and my confidence. That is parenting.

When I was 13 I had saved my babysitting money and purchased my own 10-speed bike. I valued that bike and still feel the loss from it’s theft 30 years latter.. My parents could have bought it for me, but instead they parented.

I am not sure my parents knew the right moments to parent or even if it was a conscious choice. I know I didn’t and still don’t. Most days I just want everyone alive at the end of the day. I am very certain my children will be making some major mistakes in their lives, but so do I. We all do. That’s called life.

I’ll always be here, but now my job is to listen, not to do. I’ll always be here for them to encourage and cheer and cry and laugh and, oh yea, love. Parenting, my children have been training me and now I am ready for the biggest job yet, letting them parent their own children. The best sport of all time because we all get to play.

“It is time for parents to teach young people early on that in diversity there is beauty and there is strength. Maya Angelou

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